| Alison VanderVeen (née Helder) July 21, 1967 - November 15, 2009 | |||
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The Lord has promoted to glory Alison VanderVeen on Sunday, November 15, 2009 at the age of 42 years. She was the loving wife of Jeff VanderVeen, dear mother of Brent and Janelle, Cameron, Sarah, Bethany, Derek and Naomi. Beloved daughter of William and Anne Helder, and daughter-in-law of Dick and Tini VanderVeen. Loved sister of Kirsten and James Sloots, Sue and Jeremy Jagt, Lois and Martin Vanderwal, Hannah and Mark Timmerman, Peter Helder, and sister-in-law to Ted and Helen VanderVeen, Karen VanderVeen, and Paul and Wilma VanderVeen. Also survived by grandparents, Bertha Jissink and Thies VanderVeen. Alison was a long-time employee of TD Canada Trust as a Financial Services Representative. | |||
Sunday, November 29, 2009
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Monday, September 28, 2009
Still here...
Monday, August 3, 2009
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
An Untruth
Not a lie, but an "untruth"--this past weekend I told one.
On Sunday I saw a friend from the past; we had just a few moments to chat after church.
"Is it hard with Annika? Hard with her because of Tabitha, you know?" She was trying to be kind, thinking that she might understand how it could be hard. She was on her way to the church nursery to pick up her 9 week old daughter.
I remembered our last encounter over a year ago. "But you're okay now? You're doing better, aren't you?"
And I told an untruth. "Yes," I said, "it is sometimes."
But that's not true. It's not hard with Annika. There is nothing difficult about having her. She is delightful, completely and utterly captivating.
It is hard to not have Tabitha. I could get my mind in a tangle thinking about the likelihood that if we had Tabitha here with us she would have been named "Annika" and I wouldn't have this Annika now. But that's not how I wish to think. And it's not a helpful line of thought.
So in the end, this is what is true--it is not hard with Annika; and, it is hard without Tabitha.
On Sunday I saw a friend from the past; we had just a few moments to chat after church.
"Is it hard with Annika? Hard with her because of Tabitha, you know?" She was trying to be kind, thinking that she might understand how it could be hard. She was on her way to the church nursery to pick up her 9 week old daughter.
I remembered our last encounter over a year ago. "But you're okay now? You're doing better, aren't you?"
And I told an untruth. "Yes," I said, "it is sometimes."
But that's not true. It's not hard with Annika. There is nothing difficult about having her. She is delightful, completely and utterly captivating.
It is hard to not have Tabitha. I could get my mind in a tangle thinking about the likelihood that if we had Tabitha here with us she would have been named "Annika" and I wouldn't have this Annika now. But that's not how I wish to think. And it's not a helpful line of thought.
So in the end, this is what is true--it is not hard with Annika; and, it is hard without Tabitha.
Thursday, July 2, 2009
Summer Reading
Some of the books that I have read recently or have in my pile to read in the month of July:
Finding Nouf, Zoe Ferraris
The Eyre Affair, Jasper Fforde
Lost In A Good Book, Jasper Fforde
The Well of Lost Plots, Jasper Fforde
Persuasion, Jane Austin (my choice, Book Club #1)
Pure Inventions, James King (Marsha's choice, Book Club #2)
Heaven for Kids, Randy Alcorn
The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society, Mary Ann Shaffer and Annie Barrows
I'll try to update with a bit of commentary in the next few weeks.
I'll leave you with two crazy pictures. Our camera has a panoramic feature which allows you to take three pictures that will be "seamed" together. Mark has played around with this before. He decided to try it out again, with some entertaining results. Be sure to click on the picture to enlarge to get the full effect!
Finding Nouf, Zoe Ferraris
The Eyre Affair, Jasper Fforde
Lost In A Good Book, Jasper Fforde
The Well of Lost Plots, Jasper Fforde
Persuasion, Jane Austin (my choice, Book Club #1)
Pure Inventions, James King (Marsha's choice, Book Club #2)
Heaven for Kids, Randy Alcorn
The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society, Mary Ann Shaffer and Annie Barrows
I'll try to update with a bit of commentary in the next few weeks.
I'll leave you with two crazy pictures. Our camera has a panoramic feature which allows you to take three pictures that will be "seamed" together. Mark has played around with this before. He decided to try it out again, with some entertaining results. Be sure to click on the picture to enlarge to get the full effect!
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Sunday, June 14, 2009
Death is Not Dying
Find an hour that you can spend quietly and watch/listen to this. I have only had a chance to watch the first 20 minutes, but have been strengthened and encouraged at a time when my heart sorely needs it.
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Friday, May 29, 2009
Back to the Books
I haven't kept up with my two book clubs very consistently this past year, but here are the complete lists of what has been read.
Book Club # 1
2004:
Clara Callan (Richard B. Wright)--Hannah
The World According to Garp (John Irving)--Rachel
2005:
No Logo (Naomi Klein)--Jenn B.
Reading Lolita in Tehran (Azar Nafisi)--Sue
The Lovely Bones (Alice Sebold)--Shelley
Boy's Life (Robert McCammon)--I can't remember her name!!
The Blind Assassin (Margaret Atwood)--Tanya
The Good Earth (Pearl S. Buck)--Julia
Crow Lake (Mary Lawson)--Hannah
Birds Without Wings (Louis de Bernieres)--Rachel
2006:
Cloud Atlas (David Mitchell)--Jen L. (I think?)
Memoirs of a Geisha (Arthur Golden)--Sue
Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell (Susanna Clarke)--Shelley
Time Traveler's Wife (Audrey Niffenegger)--that girl again--what was her name??
Glass Castle (Jeannette Walls)--Tanya
The Girls (Lori Lansens)--Julia
The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time (Mark Haddon)--Hannah
The Secret Book of Grazia dei Rossi (Jacqueline Park)--Rachel
Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood (Rebecca Wells)--Sue
2007:
The Secret Life of Bees (Sue Monk Kidd)--Tanya
Riding the Bus with My Sister (Rachel Simon)--Julia
My Name is Asher Lev (Chaim Potok)--Lois
The Shadow of the Wind (Carlos Ruiz Zafon)--Sherri
Special Topics in Calamity Physics (Marisha Pessl)--Shelley
Rockbound (Frank Parker Day)--Hannah
The Big Over-Easy (Jasper Fforde)--Rachel
Water for Elephants (Sara Gruen)--Sues
2008:
Midwives (Chris Bohjalian)--Lois
*Objects in Mirror are Closer Than They Appear (Katharine Weber)--Julia
*The Red Tent (Anita Diamant)--Sherri
No Great Mischief (Alistair MacLeod)--Sarah
*Stones from the River (Ursula Hegi)--Tara
Plainsong (Kent Haruf)--Elsa
The Reluctant Fundamentalist (Mohsin Hamid)--Hannah
*Refiner's Fire (Mark Helprin)--Rachel
2009
The Lost Garden (Helen Humphreys)--Sue
Eat Pray Love (Elizabeth Gilbert)--Sarah
Belle Falls (Sherri Vanderveen)--Lois
Olive Kitteridge (Elizabeth Strout)--Sherri
Girl with a Pearl Earring (Tracy Chevalier)--Julia
Mutant Message Down Under (Marlo Morgan)--Tara
TOTAL: 41 books
*books that I didn't read/meetings I missed
I think I've got it all right--corrections are welcome!
Book Club # 2
January 27, 2007
The Life of Pi by Yann Martel (Karen’s pick)
March 3, 2007
Never Let Me Go by Kazuo Isiguro (Hannah’s pick)
April 14, 2007
Throwaway Daughter by Ting-xing Ye (Marsha’s pick)
May 26, 2007
The Russlander or Katya by Sandra Birdsell (Petra’s pick)
July 7, 2007
Howards End by E.M. Forster (Kirsten’s pick)
September 22, 2007
Gilead by Marilynne Robinson (Sarah’s pick)
November 2, 2007
The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver (Trina’s pick)
December 7, 2007
One Hundred Years of Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez (Hannah’s pick)
January 19, 2008
Orlando: A Biography by Virginia Woolf (Karen’s pick)
February 23, 2008
*The Moonstone by Wilkie Collins (Marsha’s pick)
April 5, 2008
*Stones from the River by Ursula Hegi (Petra’s pick)
*Northanger Abbey by Jane Austen (Petra’s pick)
May 17, 2008
The Colony of Unrequited Dreams by Wayne Johnston (Kirsten’s pick)
June 28, 2008
The Historian by Elizabeth Kostova (Sarah’s pick)
July 28, 2008
Special Topics in Calamity Physics by Marisha Pessl (Hannah’s pick)
September 20, 2008
Sweetness in the Belly by Camilla Gibb (Trina’s pick)
October 25, 2008
*Rebecca by Daphne DuMaurier (Marsha’s pick)
November 28, 2008
*The Stone Carvers by Jane Urquhart (Petra’s pick)
January 17th, 2009
Travels with my Aunt by Graham Greene (Kirsten’s pick)
February 21th, 2009
The Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man by James Joyce (Sarah’s pick)
March 28th, 2009
*East of Eden by John Steinbeck (Kim’s pick)
May 9, 2009
The Time-Traveler’s Wife by Audrey Niffenegger (Trina’s pick)
June 13, 2009
Olive Kitteridge by Elizabeth Strout (Hannah’s pick)
TOTAL: 23 books
You'll notice some overlap--some by me, and some by other people's choices. And my last choice for Book Club # 2? Completely self-serving, because I didn't have time to finish the book for Club # 1 but really, really enjoyed what I had read, and so now I HAVE to finish it (and now I have all the insights too.)
:)
Book Club # 1
2004:
Clara Callan (Richard B. Wright)--Hannah
The World According to Garp (John Irving)--Rachel
2005:
No Logo (Naomi Klein)--Jenn B.
Reading Lolita in Tehran (Azar Nafisi)--Sue
The Lovely Bones (Alice Sebold)--Shelley
Boy's Life (Robert McCammon)--I can't remember her name!!
The Blind Assassin (Margaret Atwood)--Tanya
The Good Earth (Pearl S. Buck)--Julia
Crow Lake (Mary Lawson)--Hannah
Birds Without Wings (Louis de Bernieres)--Rachel
2006:
Cloud Atlas (David Mitchell)--Jen L. (I think?)
Memoirs of a Geisha (Arthur Golden)--Sue
Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell (Susanna Clarke)--Shelley
Time Traveler's Wife (Audrey Niffenegger)--that girl again--what was her name??
Glass Castle (Jeannette Walls)--Tanya
The Girls (Lori Lansens)--Julia
The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time (Mark Haddon)--Hannah
The Secret Book of Grazia dei Rossi (Jacqueline Park)--Rachel
Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood (Rebecca Wells)--Sue
2007:
The Secret Life of Bees (Sue Monk Kidd)--Tanya
Riding the Bus with My Sister (Rachel Simon)--Julia
My Name is Asher Lev (Chaim Potok)--Lois
The Shadow of the Wind (Carlos Ruiz Zafon)--Sherri
Special Topics in Calamity Physics (Marisha Pessl)--Shelley
Rockbound (Frank Parker Day)--Hannah
The Big Over-Easy (Jasper Fforde)--Rachel
Water for Elephants (Sara Gruen)--Sues
2008:
Midwives (Chris Bohjalian)--Lois
*Objects in Mirror are Closer Than They Appear (Katharine Weber)--Julia
*The Red Tent (Anita Diamant)--Sherri
No Great Mischief (Alistair MacLeod)--Sarah
*Stones from the River (Ursula Hegi)--Tara
Plainsong (Kent Haruf)--Elsa
The Reluctant Fundamentalist (Mohsin Hamid)--Hannah
*Refiner's Fire (Mark Helprin)--Rachel
2009
The Lost Garden (Helen Humphreys)--Sue
Eat Pray Love (Elizabeth Gilbert)--Sarah
Belle Falls (Sherri Vanderveen)--Lois
Olive Kitteridge (Elizabeth Strout)--Sherri
Girl with a Pearl Earring (Tracy Chevalier)--Julia
Mutant Message Down Under (Marlo Morgan)--Tara
TOTAL: 41 books
*books that I didn't read/meetings I missed
I think I've got it all right--corrections are welcome!
Book Club # 2
January 27, 2007
The Life of Pi by Yann Martel (Karen’s pick)
March 3, 2007
Never Let Me Go by Kazuo Isiguro (Hannah’s pick)
April 14, 2007
Throwaway Daughter by Ting-xing Ye (Marsha’s pick)
May 26, 2007
The Russlander or Katya by Sandra Birdsell (Petra’s pick)
July 7, 2007
Howards End by E.M. Forster (Kirsten’s pick)
September 22, 2007
Gilead by Marilynne Robinson (Sarah’s pick)
November 2, 2007
The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver (Trina’s pick)
December 7, 2007
One Hundred Years of Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez (Hannah’s pick)
January 19, 2008
Orlando: A Biography by Virginia Woolf (Karen’s pick)
February 23, 2008
*The Moonstone by Wilkie Collins (Marsha’s pick)
April 5, 2008
*Stones from the River by Ursula Hegi (Petra’s pick)
*Northanger Abbey by Jane Austen (Petra’s pick)
May 17, 2008
The Colony of Unrequited Dreams by Wayne Johnston (Kirsten’s pick)
June 28, 2008
The Historian by Elizabeth Kostova (Sarah’s pick)
July 28, 2008
Special Topics in Calamity Physics by Marisha Pessl (Hannah’s pick)
September 20, 2008
Sweetness in the Belly by Camilla Gibb (Trina’s pick)
October 25, 2008
*Rebecca by Daphne DuMaurier (Marsha’s pick)
November 28, 2008
*The Stone Carvers by Jane Urquhart (Petra’s pick)
January 17th, 2009
Travels with my Aunt by Graham Greene (Kirsten’s pick)
February 21th, 2009
The Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man by James Joyce (Sarah’s pick)
March 28th, 2009
*East of Eden by John Steinbeck (Kim’s pick)
May 9, 2009
The Time-Traveler’s Wife by Audrey Niffenegger (Trina’s pick)
June 13, 2009
Olive Kitteridge by Elizabeth Strout (Hannah’s pick)
TOTAL: 23 books
You'll notice some overlap--some by me, and some by other people's choices. And my last choice for Book Club # 2? Completely self-serving, because I didn't have time to finish the book for Club # 1 but really, really enjoyed what I had read, and so now I HAVE to finish it (and now I have all the insights too.)
:)
Saturday, May 23, 2009
The Time Has Come...
...to go private.
Thank you all for reading, encouraging, and praying.
If you would like an invitation to view this blog in the future (which will be returning to mostly book-related posts), please send me an e-mail.
I find I don't have the words to explain what life is like now. I don't know how to give expression to the new joy and the growing grief that continue to co-exist. And so I have been avoiding my blog or only posting pictures. Please read this,this, or this by Molly Piper to get a better sense of what I might say if I had the words.
Someone once taught me a "trick" for meditating on a Bible verse: read the verse as many times as there are words; each time you reread the words, place the emphasis on the next word, and contemplate the shift in tone, intent, and implication. This is what I've been doing with that "trick" these days:
I look forward to hearing from you if you want to keep reading.
Thank you all for reading, encouraging, and praying.
If you would like an invitation to view this blog in the future (which will be returning to mostly book-related posts), please send me an e-mail.
I find I don't have the words to explain what life is like now. I don't know how to give expression to the new joy and the growing grief that continue to co-exist. And so I have been avoiding my blog or only posting pictures. Please read this,this, or this by Molly Piper to get a better sense of what I might say if I had the words.
Someone once taught me a "trick" for meditating on a Bible verse: read the verse as many times as there are words; each time you reread the words, place the emphasis on the next word, and contemplate the shift in tone, intent, and implication. This is what I've been doing with that "trick" these days:
SHE is not Tabitha.
She IS not Tabitha.
She is NOT Tabitha.
She is not TABITHA.
And there is both grief and gratitude in that, my friends.She IS not Tabitha.
She is NOT Tabitha.
She is not TABITHA.
I look forward to hearing from you if you want to keep reading.
Sunday, May 10, 2009
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Pictures--Week 1
Baby Girl "A"
Born: 00:06, Thursday, March 26, 2009
Weight: 6 lb 8 oz
Length: aprox. 20 inches
Because of difficulty breathing, she ended up in the NICU. This was soon compounded by low blood-sugar levels, weight loss, jaundice and feeding issues. But by Day 5, she was moved out of "Level 3" to the "Level 2 Nursery."
Born: 00:06, Thursday, March 26, 2009
Weight: 6 lb 8 oz
Length: aprox. 20 inches
Because of difficulty breathing, she ended up in the NICU. This was soon compounded by low blood-sugar levels, weight loss, jaundice and feeding issues. But by Day 5, she was moved out of "Level 3" to the "Level 2 Nursery."
Monday, April 6, 2009
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Monday, March 23, 2009
Preparation
ETA: Cradle and stand--designed and crafted by M.
Baby quilt--made by my mom for me 31 years ago
Burp cloth (can you even see it?) and mattress cover--my paltry creative contribution :)
Stuffed bear--picked out by G.
Stuffed monkey--a gift from my students at the end of last semester (along with a collection of children's books)
Thursday, February 19, 2009
At the end of a year...
One year ago yesterday I posted this. I never knew or expected that sharing my daughter with the anonymous world of the internet would bring me a world of support and encouragement.
Thank you Kenzie, Shellie, Jessica K., Devin, Jessica P., Mrs. Manz, Lisa V., Momof3, and many others who have read, commented, e-mailed and prayed. I have learned that it is possible to be blessed through grief and loss.
Our wedding text, Psalm 121, has become my daily meditation, as we begin this "new" year and enter these last weeks of expectation.
Thank you Kenzie, Shellie, Jessica K., Devin, Jessica P., Mrs. Manz, Lisa V., Momof3, and many others who have read, commented, e-mailed and prayed. I have learned that it is possible to be blessed through grief and loss.
Our wedding text, Psalm 121, has become my daily meditation, as we begin this "new" year and enter these last weeks of expectation.
Psalm 121
A song of ascents.
1 I lift up my eyes to the hills—
where does my help come from?
2 My help comes from the LORD,
the Maker of heaven and earth.
3 He will not let your foot slip—
he who watches over you will not slumber;
4 indeed, he who watches over Israel
will neither slumber nor sleep.
5 The LORD watches over you—
the LORD is your shade at your right hand;
6 the sun will not harm you by day,
nor the moon by night.
7 The LORD will keep you from all harm—
he will watch over your life;
8 the LORD will watch over your coming and going
both now and forevermore.
Sunday, February 1, 2009
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